Did you hang the flag?

"One generation will commend your works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts" (Psalm 145:4).

My daddy knew many Bible verses and quoted them to us again and again.  I never heard him refer to the above-mentioned Scripture, but I can tell you that he practiced it.

I watched the Memorial Day presentation from our nation's capital this year with a smile...that is something that I had shared with daddy. I think my first thought upon awakening this morning was "Did you hang the flag, yet?"

Memorial Day has always been a "big" deal in the Huffingham family.  Our daddy was a veteran of World War II.  He actually was the first young man from their community to enlist when war had been declared in 1941.  My parents were married only 7 weeks when daddy shipped out to the Pacific and mother came home to wait - 43 months.

During those months, tragedy struck her family.   The only brother and eldest child, Rudolph, was killed in action.  As the first-born and only male in his family, he had played a unique role and much was expected of him.  His sisters have remembered his strong personality, and they have continued to hold him in a place of high esteem.  He entered the armed services in 1943 - became a pilot - and gave his life in the service of his country on May 29, 1944 (that's 73  years ago on this Memorial Day). .Uncle Rudolph had been my daddy's best friend.  There's no doubt in my mind, but that is why Memorial Day carried that much weight in our little family.

But our family was not alone.  Many of my childhood friends can tell you stories of an uncle who was killed in World War II.  Years later when i met my children's father, his mother was quick to tell me that she too had lost a brother, Claude Leonard Gentry, in the war.

My generation has been called the Baby Boomers because so many of us were born between the end of World War II (1945) and the early 60's. I'm not sure we will ever be called the Greatest Generation even though we went through a war as well.  One that was not as well received as daddy's war had been.  But we also lost those we love.  

These individuals are what we know and honor as HEROES.  They gave their life for something they believed in. They are examples of what Jesus taught when he said,  "Greater love hath no man, but that he lay down his life for his friends" (John 15:13). 

My daddy's advice to his great grandchildren and those who are yet to come - Be sure you tell the stories I've told you - about the bravery and sacrifice of those who came before you.  One of his favorite Christian songs was Find Us Faithful.  We do find our father faithful, and we will tell the stories of his generation - and  - I hung the flag!

"We remember with grateful hearts the men and women of our country who in the day of decision ventured much for the liberties we now enjoy (From the Book  of Common Prayer, Prayers of Thanksgiving).)

May your life be filled with enough sunshine

to make you appreciate the shadows

Before it was "en vogue"

 "A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children...".

(Proverbs 13:22 a)

In my mind, Ellie and Pauline Nesmith left a great inheritance to my siblings, my cousins and me (there are 18 of us).  Faith, hope, love (for God and our fellowman) courage, an appreciation of pretty things (especially flowers) and the right way to live - and die.

Iva Pauline Mercer Nesmith was always looking for ways to improve herself and her surroundings. She had a beautiful yard, in later life wore beautiful clothes and was really smart.  Sometimes we have said that she was truly a person who was ahead of her time.

Which makes it interesting to me that on this day May 20, 1971 that at least 8 years before Community Hospice of Northeast Florida was established...Grandma died at home.

As I was thinking about this date and its significance, I asked my mother and sisters what they remembered about it.

A year before my grandma had been very ill and doctors had removed her spleen. She was diagnosed with something called "Idiopathic Purpura".  In addition to that, she had several other ailments including diabetes which had affected her health for many many years.

My mother remembers that year as a very special time.  On January 1, 1971,  our family gathered to celebrate my grandparents 50th anniversary.  It was a lovely event.

However, grandma's health began to deteriorate more in early April. A lovely trip with Aunt Carolyn to visit Aunt Beth in Minneapolis was cut short and she was hospitalized soon after arriving back in Jacksonville.   

Within a few days, my mother, Aunt Carolyn and Granddaddy were meeting with Grandma's endocrinologist who was also her personal physician.  The three other aunts did not live in Jacksonville at that time.

Aunt Carolyn remembers that Dr. Gomez said that nothing they were doing for Grandma was helping and Granddaddy had a rather homespun remark:

"Isn't that like putting water in a pipe and it runs straight through?"  When Dr. Gomez said yes, the Granddaddy said, "Then I want to take her home".

My mother remembered that granddaddy said "where you go, I will go" which really would have been what my grandma would have said to him.  Granddaddy just knew that Grandma wanted to go home - not just to Heaven but to their Ryar Road home.

Aunt Beth recalls that their parents had talked about not extending their lives with artificial devices so they had chosen for her not to have kidney dialysis.  Aunt Ann agreed with that.

And so it was that only three days after they took her home, just before 9:00 AM on Thursday, May 20, 1971, Granddaddy Nesmith and his five daughters bid farewell to his wife, their mother and my grandma.

That was 46 years ago.  And what did that experience teach us - what did my grandparents leave us - Faith - Commitment and hopefully how to die!

May your life be filled with enough sunshine

to make you appreciate the shadows

What I love about Mother's Day

Mother's Day is about MOTHERS

Greeting cards, radio and television advertisements, even the window clerk at McDonald's this morning

Everyone knows that it' Mother's Day weekend.

Mother's Day is about honoring out mothers.

I have always liked Mother's Day.  So did my daddy.   I think I was about six when he drew a picture of a child handing a flower to a woman in a rocking chair on a piece of white paper, and it was my job to color it.  That was my mother's first Mother's Day card "from me."  Daddy often took my sister, Cindy, and me shopping to purchase a gift. He was good like that.  A trait I  hope my brothers inherited  

A few years ago I stood in a ladies restroom line.  The fact that it was long was punctuated by a mirrored wall which made it seem all the longer.  As I stood there, I noticed someone I recognized. How did my mother get there?

You guessed it. My own reflection was in that mirror.

I look more like my mother every day.

I was putting some leftover fish in the refrigerator when I remembered that I have some instant grits in my pantry.

I could have fish and grits for breakfast.

Great Scott.

Now I am acting like my mother.

Mothers Day is about being a mother.

I found out that I was going to have a baby the day after Mother's Day in 1971. There were some strange circumstances going on in my life that year, No need for the details except I"ll never forget the doctor's words "Your cervix is blue - you are pregnant" (Oops, I said no need for details,  didn't I?) My question to him was really silly -

"Is it fun to have a baby?"

"It's exciting," was his response.

And 46 years later I can tell you that he was correct.

That is if you use the word having a baby to mean being a parent. I have 3 children - delivering them would not be what I call FUN - worth it, but not fun.

With each child, I became more convinced of God's blessing on my life, something that continues to this day.

Because by now I have had to privilege of watching my adult children - parent.

Becca is a teacher (by instinct, calling, training) and not only does she love teaching elementary school children, she loves teaching the three children that God blessed her with.  Most people know that those children, biological siblings, came to us through adoption and we cannot imagine life without them.

Renee is a nurturer.  And it is fun to see her love her girls into Godly women as well as work with pre-school children (and their parents) to teach them about God's love.  It took me more than 6 months to realize the joy of being a grandmother but when I did  - well I can tell you that from that day til this, the only name I like better than Mom is Grandma.

Tray is a charmer  He's my child that no matter how vexed I might be, can always make me smile. I recently teased his youngest daughter that I'm the reason her parents married - I wanted grandchildren with blond curls like she has.  While that is not true, she does make me think of the little girl on the Sunshine Bread wrapper of many years ago.

I've been heard to say "I wish everyone could have my mother  - but no one better try to steal her." 

Although I like the independent person I  believe I am, I am still happy to be told,  "you are just like your mother".  

So here's a promise to my children, I'm going to take care of my skin, keep my mind sharp through reading and writing and continue to cultivate friendships.  Just in case, I really am just like my mother - now in her 95th year of life!  

May your life be filled with enough sunshine

to make you appreciate the shadows

How could I forget?

The mechanic did not mince words.

"Your front tires are bald," he said.

And so I was spending some time at my computer - googling - tires. I was actually spending more time that I wanted googling tires.And I kept thinking - for crying out loud.

This was after reconciling my checkbook and seeing how much money I have spent on my vehicle already this year.  GRRRR

Besides that - tires are not fun.  Necessary yes, but certainly not as much fun as a new outfit (or two) or a trip or well - I bet you can think of things you would rather have than tires.

GRRRR

And then out of the corner of my eye, I saw him (or her).

It was a Robin.

Full disclosure - I had to google the word Robin to be sure. That was only after I noticed that it had a red breast.

As I watched the bird move from branch to branch I suddenly remembered a poem my daddy used to love to quote to me:

" Said the Robin to the Sparrow, 'I should really like to know

Why these anxious human beings Rush about and worry so.' 

'Said the Sparrow to the Robin  "Friend, I think that it must be

That they have no Heavenly Father;

 Such as cares for you and me".

It has been a couple of weeks since that afternoon.  Two new tires later, I realize once again that there is really no reason to get all in a tither.

I do have a Heavenly Father.  He does care for me.  I just sometimes need that ever so gentle reminder.

"His eye is on the sparrow - and I know He watches me".

May your life be filled with enough sunshine

to make you appreciate the shadows

Do you wanna build a Snowman?

Today is my "little" sister's birthday.  Cynthia Faye Huffingham was born on this day.  'no need to give you the year.

In the Holiday Classic, WHITE CHRISTMAS, Rosemary Clooney and Vera-Ellen sing a great song about Sisters - and what we share.  Cindy and I don't share much when it comes to material things.  If you know us you know that she is tall and I am not.  She still likes to make dinner.  I like to make reservations.  She likes babies.  I prefer the elderly.  We both like the beach, rock and roll music and because of the love instilled in us by our father ...the Florida Gators.

One of my earliest memories is a ride in an ambulance, across the Main Street Bridge on a crisp January day when we were "bringing Cindy home."  Isn't that odd - bringing her home in an ambulance?

Another memory is the time she came running in the house after a fall from her bicycle.

"Pray, Paula, pray," she cried.  "I just know it's broken."

It was.

There have been many times in our lives as sisters that we have had to do just that...

Pray, pray, pray.

We have shared happy times - marriage, the birth of babies, our parents 50th anniversary, and our mother's 90th birthday.  And one of the happiest was the day I married Rich Suhey.

We have shared sad times - miscarriages, the end of my marriages (one by divorce; one by death) the passing of our daddy and of course, when she lost her precious grandbaby, Blakelie.

There were two prints that hung in family kitchen for many years.  One was a blonde peeling an apple, one a brunette with a pencil over her ear.  My mother said that was a perfect description of the two of us.  She was always working and I was always thinking. 

When my second child, Renee, was born, one of the first things I reaIized was that Becca now had what I have loved...a little sister.  My daughters
have carried on that same "you laugh, I laugh; you cry, I cry" attitude. And now I have two sets of grand-daughters - Abbie and her little sister, Allie and Grace and Reagan.

When we were sharing some information about a friend who had lost her little sister, Grace was quick to say- "Reagan gets on my nerves, but I would not want her to not be here."

That's exactly right - "Having a sister is like having a best friend you can’t get rid of. You know whatever you do, they’ll still be there. 

PS Don't have a sister?  Well, I'm not giving you mine.  But I would encourage you to find a friend who accepts you as you are, who prays for you, who shares what they have ...and no matter what you do - will still be there".   Cindy and I both have a few of those and for them - we are truly grateful.

How do you like your eggs?

Johnny Montgomery was my best friend in high school.  I promise, promise, promise that he was NEVER my boyfriend.

However, one of the things that we could do for hours - was talk - on the phone or in our family kitchen -- sometimes until late at night.

One night stays in my memory.  Everyone in my family was asleep - upstairs.  We just kept talking - maybe about the Bible or what our plans were for our Youth for Christ Club or probably about my love life,

Suddenly, or so it seemed to me, my daddy was walking over to the kitchen cabinet and leaning down to pull out a frying pan -

"How do you like your eggs, Johnny?"

We still laugh about that moment.  I can assure you that Johnny left straight away. And many years later when my daddy lay dying, Johnny visited him, prayed for him, and they both remembered how special my friendship with him had been.

So, how do you like your eggs?

I love an omelet. I thought of that this week when I read "You cannot have an omelet unless you break the eggs." I'm not sure who to credit for those words.  I do know that I "get it".

It is the last day of 2016.  As i reflect on these 365 days that are now in my rear view mirror, I know there have been times when my eggs have been broken.

Our church was beginning a "shepherding program".  Would I participate?  Of course.  I love to hep others.  And then I realized that I have shepherding responsibilities in my own family.  I am my mother's shepherd.  HUM.  That decision freed me up to do something else - lead a Bible study for women.  We named the Bible study "Wonder Women" with a tag line - "Have you ever wondered what the Bible has to say to you?"  Those women have added so much to my life! They are like the combination of all the ingredients that would go into an omelet: a little ham, green pepper, onion, and lots of cheese.

The eggs got broken for me when I got a call that my services would no longer be needed at the home builder where I was working as a sales assistant.  I was most disappointed, for that position had been not only been fun, but it was what I thought to be my ticket to financial freedom.  Yeah right.  What in the world is "financial freedom"?

That news led me to the bank that holds my mortgage.  Friends had encouraged me to investigate refinancing at that same bank.  I thought there was no way. However, after many weeks and lots of work, this week my new loan was closed,

And in the meantime, the home builder called me.  Would I come back? Were they kidding?  I absolutely love the time I spend assisting the realtors, watching houses being built and then being there when families are given the keys to their new homes.

Neither of my examples is earth shattering.  I know that.  I've not lost anyone dear to me.  My financial status is acceptable for my lifestyle, my health is good.  I don't know what 2017 holds.  I do know that it is my prayer that whenever any of the eggs in my life get broken, I'll endeavor to know that those eggs can make an omelet.

"Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up.  You will increase my honor and comfort me once more".  Isaiah 71:20-21

May your life be filled with enough sunshine

to make you appreciate the shadows

Doing what they always did

As Advent approached, I decided that I wanted to participate in some sort of daily meditation as a means to embrace the significance of this time in Christendom really.  I made a trip to my local Christian bookstore (Lifeway) and purchased A 28 Day Advent Devotional From Heaven, by A. W. Tozer.

I will be truthful.  I didn't really like it.  However, I read the appointed passage each day and when I was thinking of what I want to say I scanned the pages and found at least one sentence that I had underlined.   He wrote "how easy it might have been for God to have never shown us that He loved us" which is certainly what He did when He gave us His only Son.

That said, when I wasn't enjoying the aforementioned book, I found another.  And every day I have read from Waiting here for you, An Advent Journey of Hope, by Louie Giglio.   Fortunately, this one spoke to me.

Especially what I read today.

"On this night, shepherds were doing what they always did, keeping an eye on Bethlehems's sheep."

These ordinary men were most likely on the bottom line of an org. chart.  Maybe some had dreams of becoming a master shepherd but for the most part they were just tending sheep.  Not a very glamourous job for sure.  And Giglio points out that because of their profession, they were ceremoniously unclean - they couldn't go to the temple, even if they wanted to.

And yet, as they stood watch, something glorious happened.  An angel spoke - and then others sang - and then they went to Bethlehem.

They didn't need permission to go to the manger and they were privileged to see the Baby who had been born that night.If Jesus had been born in a mansion, they would not have been welcomed.

Sometimes my life seems very mundane.  It seems that others are having more fun, completing projects that have great value, being recognized.  Truth be told, I'd rather be one of the wise men.  I like bringing gifts.  Or I wouldn't have minded being an angel - or even the innkeeper.

Who wants to be a shepherd?

And yet when I look at the shepherds, recognizing that they were doing what they always did, I realize that what is important for me is to keep doing what I always do.  That's my plan for 2017.

May your life be filled with enough sunshine

to make you appreciate the shadows