The morning after

As the time for our dad's passing was drawing close, many of our friends and family members believed that our mother would follow him to Heaven - QUICKLY.  In their 67 years of marriage, she had cared for him, honored him, encouraged him - and he had done the same for her.  Some might have imagined that she would not want to live without him.

She really wasn't sure about how it was going to be.  She had told me a few weeks prior that she intended to depend on me, her sister, Carolyn, and daddy's sister, Gloria, to help her adjust to this new life as a widow.  At that time, I had been a widow for 11 years; Aunt Carolyn for four and Aunt Gloria for two.  I remember I thought I'm going to be adjusting to life without my daddy - and I'm not sure I wanted to be helping her adjust to the role of a widow.

I'm going to add a caveat here -- It took my mother moving to Texas four years after daddy passed before I had the freedom to grieve the loss of my dad.  However, this is about Iva Lou - not me.

Last week as I was going through some of mother's journals, I found what she wrote the day after daddy died. 

Now I know that's not legible to you so here's what it says:

"Iva has a dream of sharing life with her neighbors, of spending time with the family; of a Bible study; of experiencing all that my church has to offer; of living in giving thanks in my new period of adjustment without my Earl.  I surrendered him to God in 1954, and he listened and that's how we became a part of the Gideon ministry". 

A few days later she wrote that she had been blessed by the warmth of the spirit - and was endeavoring to practice I Thessalonians 5:18

My siblings, our children and I heard that verse again and again - and we knew that our mother practiced it.

About three weeks after daddy died, I came home to find Rev. Kevin Pound and his wife, Patty, in my living room.  My mother had called him to come and bless her wedding ring - which she moved to her right hand.

Rather than depend on me, Aunt Carolyn or Aunt Gloria, mother intended to serve God in her widowhood.

She basically did that for the next 10 years.  It was only when the Pandemic stole her opportunity to socialize and thus share the faith that sustained her that she became quiet.

I have her journals and I also have her ring.  While I don't wear it all the time, when I do, I appreciate the fact that it was important to our mother to let others know – she believed that the Lord wanted her to serve Him – and that’s what she did best - to become the woman that God wanted her to be. 

And as I peruse all those journals I can say - that her words (and the faith that she practiced) are helping me - to become the woman that God wants me to be.  That would make her happy!!!

  May you have enough sunshine in your life

To make you appreciate the shadows