My mother's words

 "I cried out for my mother".

I was enjoying breakfast with my friend, Virginia.  We always share what's happening in our lives - the good, the bad and yes - sometimes - the ugly,  

She was about to undergo a medical procedure and the prep was making her ill.

"It's been more than 10 years since I could talk with my mother", she said, "and yet when I was sick, it was just as if I were a little girl and knew my mother could make it better."

That was Virginia's response as I said "I wish I could talk with my mother - She would be able to help me sort this out." (Now let me hasten to say - nothing is horribly wrong in my life.   It is a time of adjustment.)

We knew that neither of us could talk with our mother that day.  We parted with hugs and I love you's and the day continued.  A project loomed ahead of me.  

It involved my mother's journals.

Of course, as I rearranged those books I stopped and read some of her entries.

And what kept jumping off the pages???

"Paula took me; Paula cooked supper; Paula and I had a discussion"

Oh my, we did have some discussions.  Mother would get so "put out with me" when I didn't think what she wanted to do was such a great idea. - one day she tried walking to Mandarin Presbyterian Church from Paddle Boat Lane.  She made it to Hardage Funeral Home and fortunately, our friend, David, was there and he drove her back home.  Another day she rearranged the outdoor plants that were hung from limbs and positioned between the azalea bushes.  That day she said, "I knew you wouldn't like it but I did it anyway."

Now I see her as really wanting to be independent.  Then I saw her as stubborn.

But back to my name - and the fact that I had been feeling the need to talk with her.

Here's something my mother wrote:

"Lord, please help Paula relax and know that everything is going to be all right. Give her some suggestions as to how to deal with the situations that she sees as obstacles."  

Hum.

My mother's words - exactly what I needed.

Thanks be to God.

   May you have enough sunshine in your life

To make you appreciate the shadows