I love the account of Jacob's wrestling match with the angel as told in Genesis.
Probably because I've had more than one of those experience in my life.
Not with an angel, you understand. But nights when I couldn't sleep because of choices.
This week I had one of those nights. I felt like I needed to make a choice. I was being counseled from both sides. I really was unsure about it all.
And then from nowhere I remembered. . .
It was the summer of 1964. My high school boyfriend had lost his mother just months before and his father was trying to keep his little family of four together. It had been a difficult spring. And so the dad decided to take his family on a picnic - leaving early Sunday morning and spending the day at the beach. And would I like to go with them? Well, sure.
Except the plans included the fact that we would be going on a Sunday.
I always went to Sunday School and Church on Sunday. In fact, so did they. I remember that night so well. Talk about wrestling. I agonized over the choice I had to make and finally determined that I should not miss church. Truth be told, I am not sure that would still be my choice. By now, I think I was being a bit legalistic.
Fast forward to 2015, to the morning after my current wrestling experience.
I had learned the day before of the passing of one of my favorite authors - Elisabeth Elliott. Her husband, Jim, was one of five missionaries who were killed by the Auca Indians in the 50's. Elisabeth's book Through Gates of Splendor was an account of the massacre. I appreciated their "love story" and the faith that she exemplified after the tragedy.
A friend posted a list of Elizabeth's well known words and this one was especially meaningful to me.
Probably because I've had more than one of those experience in my life.
Not with an angel, you understand. But nights when I couldn't sleep because of choices.
This week I had one of those nights. I felt like I needed to make a choice. I was being counseled from both sides. I really was unsure about it all.
And then from nowhere I remembered. . .
It was the summer of 1964. My high school boyfriend had lost his mother just months before and his father was trying to keep his little family of four together. It had been a difficult spring. And so the dad decided to take his family on a picnic - leaving early Sunday morning and spending the day at the beach. And would I like to go with them? Well, sure.
Except the plans included the fact that we would be going on a Sunday.
I always went to Sunday School and Church on Sunday. In fact, so did they. I remember that night so well. Talk about wrestling. I agonized over the choice I had to make and finally determined that I should not miss church. Truth be told, I am not sure that would still be my choice. By now, I think I was being a bit legalistic.
Fast forward to 2015, to the morning after my current wrestling experience.
I had learned the day before of the passing of one of my favorite authors - Elisabeth Elliott. Her husband, Jim, was one of five missionaries who were killed by the Auca Indians in the 50's. Elisabeth's book Through Gates of Splendor was an account of the massacre. I appreciated their "love story" and the faith that she exemplified after the tragedy.
A friend posted a list of Elizabeth's well known words and this one was especially meaningful to me.
"Today is mine. Tomorrow is none of my business. If I peer anxiously into the fog of the future, I will strain my spiritual eyes so that I will not see clearly what is required of me now.” Elizabeth Elliott (1926-2015). I posted that on Facebook, adding these words- My head gets it - I just have to be sure my heart does
As I reviewed those words, I realized that I might be missing what I'm doing now because I am trying to figure out the future. And the future is a FOG. Who can see anything in the fog?
Hum.
And then I learned that the decision that I was wrestling with - was not really mine to make.
As I reviewed those words, I realized that I might be missing what I'm doing now because I am trying to figure out the future. And the future is a FOG. Who can see anything in the fog?
Hum.
And then I learned that the decision that I was wrestling with - was not really mine to make.
All that needless, restless wrestling - Will I ever learn?
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