Sing, Momma

He was an impatient little two-year-old.

So cute - no doubt about it.

But so impatient.

I was putting breakfast on the table and had decided this cold North Carolina morning, three days before Thanksgiving in 1979 would be a great time for hot chocolate.

Steam was rising from the three Styrofoam cups as I said, "let it cool a bit."

Eight-year-old Becca listened, as did five-year-old Renee. However - my impatient little Tray thought he knew better than his momma.

He reached across and pulled it toward him.  Suddenly that hot water was running not just across the table, but splashing on his body.

I grabbed him, put him in the sink and begin to spray cold water. What I hadn't realized that when I grabbed him, the chenille bathrobe I was wearing held heat - and that made the burn worse.

We were on the way to the hospital in Lexington, and as I held him in my arms, I sang Jesus Loves Me and sometimes he would try to sing. I can almost hear his sobbing voice "nobody can do it like McDonald's can."

The trip was a 30-minute drive.  When it got quiet in our car, he would say "Sing, Momma."

Those words have stayed with me.  When I am frightened or worried, I sing.

Besides, "He who sings frightens away his ills" (Miguel De Cervantes).

I have been reminded of those words as we are in this stage of my mother's life.  She sang in her high school women's ensemble.  I have heard that she even soloed at a wedding or two. When daddy was in the Philippines during WWII, however, she stopped singing.

She would sing the hymns in church, but she was never in the choir, and she rarely sang at home. The years before daddy's passing, I would often hear them singing as they shared in a time of devotion early in the morning.

As her hearing continued to diminish, she tried to sing, but well I should just say she tried to sing.

I was with her recently at a gathering that included a performance of various songs.  It ended with Amazing Grace and I tried to get her to sing along, but she kept her mouth closed. So, I leaned into her ear and sang the words along with the musicians.  I'm not sure how much she heard, but to me, it was a wonderful experience.  And I have decided to keep doing that.... when I go visit her from now on, I'm going to sing to her.

Maybe someday she will say "Sing, Paula."

May your life be filled with enough Sunshine 

to make you appreciated the Shadows

Thank you for the spinach

I happen to like spinach - as long as it's in a salad.

I don't, however, like it cooked.

Years ago, my then husband, Ray Parker, gave this example in a sermon about being thankful.  It was especially meaningful to him because he loved his Mammaw's fried chicken and his mother's German Chocolate Cake.

"Suppose you sat down to a nice dinner," he said, "and there on the table was fried chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy and you could see a chocolate cake on a nearby counter."

Your mouth would be watering...you could hardly wait to get through with the chicken and potatoes and get to that cake".

. . . |and then you saw it.  And you knew what your mother was going to say.

You had to eat what was in the center of the table before you could dive into that cake".

And what was in the center? You guessed it - a bowl of spinach.

That story always reminded me of my brother, Lester, who had heard my daddy lamenting the fact that we (our family was visiting our South Carolina friends for Thanksgiving) were probably having turkey soup for supper.  Lester was four years old, and when we got to the table, he had the honor of asking the blessing.  And his words:

"Thank you for the turkey 'toup."

The point of these remembrances is that even when we have so many  things for which to be grateful, we also need to be thankful for those less than pleasant things....even those things that are downright awful - loss of job (or home like those in West Florida, the Carolinas, and California); catastrophic illness (or loss of a dear one because of that); or even the loss of a relationship - we can be thankful.

Sarah Young said it so well in November 22's Jesus Calling "Thankfulness is not some sort of magic formula; it is the language of Love which enables you to communicate intimately with God. A thankful mindset does not entail a denial of reality with its plethora of problems."

I suppose the most difficult bowl of spinach that ever was set before me was when  Rich Suhey suddenly died 20 years ago.  For two years following his death, I was caught up in dealing with the financial responsibilities that he left me with, the sadness of the loss of the dreams that we had shared and the inexplicable pain of being a 51-year-old widow who had been married only 8 months.

Even today all these years later, I can be met with an unexpected feeling of great sadness at my loss.

However, in those same twenty years, I have been blessed with a terrific daughter in law, seven dear grandchildren, finished my college degree and had the privilege of caring for my parents (which sometimes has been a little like that Turkey 'toup Lester was thankful for).  I have also met and formed incredible friendships, and I have loved the many opportunities of service that I have enjoyed.

Spinach is high in iron.  It enriches one's blood.

It has been said that "pain is good for you."  And how about this little quote:  "If it doesn't kill us, it makes us stronger."

I'm still breathing; I must be stronger!

And that's the way I'm looking at life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, this Black Friday, 2018.

May your life be filled with enough Sunshine 

to make you appreciated the Shadows

Faith, Family, Friends

When I am asked what my blog is about my most common answer is "Faith, Family, and Friends".  It could just as easily be "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness", or " Let's have another cup of coffee..."

Or when I am really honest, I might say "It's about me". 

Actually, it's about WHO I am.

I am faith - the faith that was instilled in me as a child, the decision I made as a six-year-old to put my trust in Jesus Christ and begin the lifelong journey as a Women of Faith. AND faith to believe everything is going to work out for the best!

I am family - my parents who met almost 90 years ago when he was 8 and she was 6; who loved each other and their children and our children with such a deep and lasting love; my dear siblings who along with their spouses, love and support me; my incredible children and grandchildren and our extended family of aunts, uncles and cousins.

I am friends - from the childhood crib babies who are still my closest friends to friends I seem to make at every juncture of my life - in churches, workplaces, and civic organizations.  AND somehow I have managed to keep most of those friends! 

My children tease me and say I meet a person one day and have planned to meet for coffee the next.  That's not very far from the truth.  A friend asked me how I've met so many people and we determined it's because I ask them questions (my children call it being nosy; I call it being interested and if I get really sophisticated I say it's because I m a journalist at heart that that's what I am supposed to do).

At any rate on this day before Thanksgiving 2018, it's my Faith, my Family and my Friends for which I am the most grateful.

I am especially mindful of the Faithfulness of God - new every morning, even when I've gone to bed the prior night wondering what the next day might hold - My mother's health and well being as well as that of her sisters and their families, the upcoming Winter Celebration at the Mandarin Museum, (Saturday, December 1 from 11-4) and what project will fill my days once 2019 has dawned.  Oh, and am I going to make any new friends?

I really do have much to be thankful for!  I hope you do as well.

Happy Thanksgiving!

                            May your life  be filled with enough Sunshine...

                                ...to make you appreciate the Shadows

"She meets her trials..."

I woke up this morning with lots of trouble on my mind.

Unsure about my mother's current state of mind and body; Disappointed that my daughter didn't get a position we wanted for her; difficulty with filling a couple of important volunteer spots at the museum, wondering where that check for all those hours I spent working early voting is,  concerned for the health of my children's father and sad as I recall the last days I spent with Rich Suhey before his untimely death 20 years ago this weekend.

I remembered the words in the annual when I was a senior "she meets her trials with a smile... and the shadows turn to light".

Hum

As is my daily practice, I poured that first cup of coffee, found the Praise and Worship music that I listen to and settled into my comfortable chair with several devotional books at my feet.

"Approach problems with a light touch...When a problem (A problem?) starts to overshadow your thoughts, bring this matter to Me" (Jesus Calling by Sarah Young).

The devotional included a reference to Scripture "...In the world you will have trouble, but take heart! I have overcome the world" (John 16:33b).  These were words that Jesus gave His disciples as His time with them was nearing the end.

And also on that page is my handwriting as the words "she meets her trails...".

Hum

I must have felt like this another time.

The wind chimes outside my bedroom window sang out to me as the November breeze picked up.

Somehow I heard my daddy's oft-repeated words "everything is gonna be all right".

I smiled!

                          May your life  be filled with enough Sunshine...

                               ...to make you appreciate the Shadows