Did you hang the flag?

"One generation will commend your works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts" (Psalm 145:4).

My daddy knew many Bible verses and quoted them to us again and again.  I never heard him refer to the above-mentioned Scripture, but I can tell you that he practiced it.

I watched the Memorial Day presentation from our nation's capital this year with a smile...that is something that I had shared with daddy. I think my first thought upon awakening this morning was "Did you hang the flag, yet?"

Memorial Day has always been a "big" deal in the Huffingham family.  Our daddy was a veteran of World War II.  He actually was the first young man from their community to enlist when war had been declared in 1941.  My parents were married only 7 weeks when daddy shipped out to the Pacific and mother came home to wait - 43 months.

During those months, tragedy struck her family.   The only brother and eldest child, Rudolph, was killed in action.  As the first-born and only male in his family, he had played a unique role and much was expected of him.  His sisters have remembered his strong personality, and they have continued to hold him in a place of high esteem.  He entered the armed services in 1943 - became a pilot - and gave his life in the service of his country on May 29, 1944 (that's 73  years ago on this Memorial Day). .Uncle Rudolph had been my daddy's best friend.  There's no doubt in my mind, but that is why Memorial Day carried that much weight in our little family.

But our family was not alone.  Many of my childhood friends can tell you stories of an uncle who was killed in World War II.  Years later when i met my children's father, his mother was quick to tell me that she too had lost a brother, Claude Leonard Gentry, in the war.

My generation has been called the Baby Boomers because so many of us were born between the end of World War II (1945) and the early 60's. I'm not sure we will ever be called the Greatest Generation even though we went through a war as well.  One that was not as well received as daddy's war had been.  But we also lost those we love.  

These individuals are what we know and honor as HEROES.  They gave their life for something they believed in. They are examples of what Jesus taught when he said,  "Greater love hath no man, but that he lay down his life for his friends" (John 15:13). 

My daddy's advice to his great grandchildren and those who are yet to come - Be sure you tell the stories I've told you - about the bravery and sacrifice of those who came before you.  One of his favorite Christian songs was Find Us Faithful.  We do find our father faithful, and we will tell the stories of his generation - and  - I hung the flag!

"We remember with grateful hearts the men and women of our country who in the day of decision ventured much for the liberties we now enjoy (From the Book  of Common Prayer, Prayers of Thanksgiving).)

May your life be filled with enough sunshine

to make you appreciate the shadows

Before it was "en vogue"

 "A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children...".

(Proverbs 13:22 a)

In my mind, Ellie and Pauline Nesmith left a great inheritance to my siblings, my cousins and me (there are 18 of us).  Faith, hope, love (for God and our fellowman) courage, an appreciation of pretty things (especially flowers) and the right way to live - and die.

Iva Pauline Mercer Nesmith was always looking for ways to improve herself and her surroundings. She had a beautiful yard, in later life wore beautiful clothes and was really smart.  Sometimes we have said that she was truly a person who was ahead of her time.

Which makes it interesting to me that on this day May 20, 1971 that at least 8 years before Community Hospice of Northeast Florida was established...Grandma died at home.

As I was thinking about this date and its significance, I asked my mother and sisters what they remembered about it.

A year before my grandma had been very ill and doctors had removed her spleen. She was diagnosed with something called "Idiopathic Purpura".  In addition to that, she had several other ailments including diabetes which had affected her health for many many years.

My mother remembers that year as a very special time.  On January 1, 1971,  our family gathered to celebrate my grandparents 50th anniversary.  It was a lovely event.

However, grandma's health began to deteriorate more in early April. A lovely trip with Aunt Carolyn to visit Aunt Beth in Minneapolis was cut short and she was hospitalized soon after arriving back in Jacksonville.   

Within a few days, my mother, Aunt Carolyn and Granddaddy were meeting with Grandma's endocrinologist who was also her personal physician.  The three other aunts did not live in Jacksonville at that time.

Aunt Carolyn remembers that Dr. Gomez said that nothing they were doing for Grandma was helping and Granddaddy had a rather homespun remark:

"Isn't that like putting water in a pipe and it runs straight through?"  When Dr. Gomez said yes, the Granddaddy said, "Then I want to take her home".

My mother remembered that granddaddy said "where you go, I will go" which really would have been what my grandma would have said to him.  Granddaddy just knew that Grandma wanted to go home - not just to Heaven but to their Ryar Road home.

Aunt Beth recalls that their parents had talked about not extending their lives with artificial devices so they had chosen for her not to have kidney dialysis.  Aunt Ann agreed with that.

And so it was that only three days after they took her home, just before 9:00 AM on Thursday, May 20, 1971, Granddaddy Nesmith and his five daughters bid farewell to his wife, their mother and my grandma.

That was 46 years ago.  And what did that experience teach us - what did my grandparents leave us - Faith - Commitment and hopefully how to die!

May your life be filled with enough sunshine

to make you appreciate the shadows

What I love about Mother's Day

Mother's Day is about MOTHERS

Greeting cards, radio and television advertisements, even the window clerk at McDonald's this morning

Everyone knows that it' Mother's Day weekend.

Mother's Day is about honoring out mothers.

I have always liked Mother's Day.  So did my daddy.   I think I was about six when he drew a picture of a child handing a flower to a woman in a rocking chair on a piece of white paper, and it was my job to color it.  That was my mother's first Mother's Day card "from me."  Daddy often took my sister, Cindy, and me shopping to purchase a gift. He was good like that.  A trait I  hope my brothers inherited  

A few years ago I stood in a ladies restroom line.  The fact that it was long was punctuated by a mirrored wall which made it seem all the longer.  As I stood there, I noticed someone I recognized. How did my mother get there?

You guessed it. My own reflection was in that mirror.

I look more like my mother every day.

I was putting some leftover fish in the refrigerator when I remembered that I have some instant grits in my pantry.

I could have fish and grits for breakfast.

Great Scott.

Now I am acting like my mother.

Mothers Day is about being a mother.

I found out that I was going to have a baby the day after Mother's Day in 1971. There were some strange circumstances going on in my life that year, No need for the details except I"ll never forget the doctor's words "Your cervix is blue - you are pregnant" (Oops, I said no need for details,  didn't I?) My question to him was really silly -

"Is it fun to have a baby?"

"It's exciting," was his response.

And 46 years later I can tell you that he was correct.

That is if you use the word having a baby to mean being a parent. I have 3 children - delivering them would not be what I call FUN - worth it, but not fun.

With each child, I became more convinced of God's blessing on my life, something that continues to this day.

Because by now I have had to privilege of watching my adult children - parent.

Becca is a teacher (by instinct, calling, training) and not only does she love teaching elementary school children, she loves teaching the three children that God blessed her with.  Most people know that those children, biological siblings, came to us through adoption and we cannot imagine life without them.

Renee is a nurturer.  And it is fun to see her love her girls into Godly women as well as work with pre-school children (and their parents) to teach them about God's love.  It took me more than 6 months to realize the joy of being a grandmother but when I did  - well I can tell you that from that day til this, the only name I like better than Mom is Grandma.

Tray is a charmer  He's my child that no matter how vexed I might be, can always make me smile. I recently teased his youngest daughter that I'm the reason her parents married - I wanted grandchildren with blond curls like she has.  While that is not true, she does make me think of the little girl on the Sunshine Bread wrapper of many years ago.

I've been heard to say "I wish everyone could have my mother  - but no one better try to steal her." 

Although I like the independent person I  believe I am, I am still happy to be told,  "you are just like your mother".  

So here's a promise to my children, I'm going to take care of my skin, keep my mind sharp through reading and writing and continue to cultivate friendships.  Just in case, I really am just like my mother - now in her 95th year of life!  

May your life be filled with enough sunshine

to make you appreciate the shadows