Bah Cupid

I have been wrestling with this thought all day long.


If you have known me for more than five minutes, you know that I am a romantic.


However, if you have known me for more than 10 minutes, you know that I am also a realist.


Somewhere down the road I finally learned that life is not just about hearts, flowers, candy and other special gifts that are symbolically given on the 14th day of February. . .even though my house is decorated with hearts, flowers and some of the special gifts that I have received on this day - and kept for the sake of sentimentality.


I have learned that while loving someone (and being loved) is wonderful, it is of extreme importance that we love ourselves - because we really cannot love others until we love ourselves.  We pray a prayer of contrition and ask for mercy -- we have not loved others as we love ourselves -- so we better get the loving ourselves taken care of or we aren't going to do a very good job or loving someone else.


And yet this is contradicting to what I have been taught and what I believe.  Jesus first, others second, you last...that's how one has JOY.


How do I reconcile this?


It's a constant struggle.


Except as I just read in one of my encouragement books that I read every day - Simple Abundance A Daybook of Comfort and Joy by Sarah Ban Breathneck - "Love yourself first and everything else will fall into place" or as comedienne Lucille Ball said "You really have to love yourself to get anything done is this world".


And besides that -  even Jesus took time for himself - we read more than once that he went aside...


I think that's where I am on this Valentine's Day 2014.