"Where's My Dad?"

In 1982, my children and I suddenly became a single-parent family. From the beginning, my goal was to keep the four of us as close as possible, with the same goals that had always been my prayer.

Church would be of paramount importance.  So would family, music, and sports.  

To be perfectly honest, sports had not been really important to my children's father.  Becca had already developed a love for softball and had enjoyed playing on the Christian school team, using her uncle Lester's glove.  He had given it to her because they are both left-handed.

Tray's older cousins, Chad and Brad, played Little League, and he could hardly wait to join them. In the spring of 1983, he did just that. His sisters and I were so excited. We even purchased shirts with his name on the back.

Tray played ball throughout elementary, middle, and high school.  He's now almost 50 (a year shy), and he loves going to watch his nephews play.  He rarely missed one of Grace's tennis matches or being at one of Reagan's cross-country meets.

There is one Little League game that stands out in my mind.

It was midsummer. Tray was 10, Renee was 13, and Becca was 16. It was time for them to go to their dad's for a month. It was also time for the All-stars. Tray had made the team, so their dad agreed to pick them up after the season ended. He would be in Jacksonville for the final game.

And, as it happened, this would be the first and only time that he would see Tray play.

The game was tied.

Now, Tray was a fast and feisty kid who loved to steal bases.  And so it was that with the game tied, Tray got on first and stole second. The batter got a hit, and Tray made it to third.  One more batter and Tray crossed home plate.

Now, I had been to all his games, but who's counting?

Who do you think Tray looked for as he scored?  You guessed it.  

"Where's my dad?"

As I look back on that day, although I know that I am loved much by my children, I also realize the importance of a father in a child's life. 

And I am grateful that through the years, although my dad, my brothers, and many dear male friends helped me raise them, I think my children loved their father, despite being miles apart. That was seen when he suffered a life-ending disease five years ago.

This is about the importance of a father in a child's life. It is not intended to be an absent father bashing.  It is instead meant to be an encouragement to any man who has stepped away from his marriage and children to find a way to be a part of those children's lives.

And in all fairness, there were times later in our children's lives (graduations, weddings, dedications and events that featured our grandchildren) that Ray Parker was present.  I really believe that especially in the last 21 years of his life, his wife, Ruth, was very instrumental in that.

This is Tray's 23rd Father's Day. 

 He's a good daddy... he got that from Earl Huffingham!

                                     May you have enough sunshine in your life 

                                            to help you appreciate the shadows