Attitude Adjustment

The Ear, Nose and Throat doctor threw me for a loop.

"Your mother has the wrong kind of hearing aids"

What?

We have been working on her inability to hear for so many years.  It has been a long and arduous process - certainly for her - but also for those of us who have something to say.

I guess others in addition to me have something to say.

At any rate, I made the earliest appointment available with our regular audiologist and I told my mother about it; put it on her calendar and arranged my Monday around that appointment.

For the past few weeks I have endeavored to find opportunities for mother to get out a bit and this weekend I decided to take her to my church for the late Sunday afternoon service.

As we left, my mother began to weep.  Through her tears she asked, "How much money do I have?  Can we save for the hearing aids the doctor suggested."

She was so upset that she hadn't been able to hear our pastor's sermon.

She had forgotten that we have an appointment today.  I had not forgotten and I got angry.

I mean banging my hands on the steering wheel angry.

We arrived at her home with me trying to explain to her that I have a plan...first see our regular audiologist - then go from there.

I left her talking with one of her friends - probably telling the woman that I was really cranky.

She would be right.

After a night of tossing and turning, I woke up to these words - "Now unto Him who is able to keep you from falling. . .".  I found the rest of the Scripture in Jude.  I read the words preceding those - and two words jumped off the page at me - "Have compassion".

Oh me.  I'm supposed to be the compassionate one.  I genuinely care about others.  I hadn't been showing my mother much compassion.  She cannot help it that her hearing has failed.

I also cannot help it that sometimes the responsibility of being a caregiver gets heavy, discouraging.

I knew the plan.  But she has missed it.  She is, after all, going to be 96 in a few months.

So this morning = having waked up feeling pretty irritated with the whole situation, I have accepted the fact that I needed an attitude adjustment.

Let's see how long I can accept this is sunshine rather than feel like I am in the shadows!

                           May your life  be filled with enough Sunshine...

                               ...to make you appreciate the Shadows

You're never fully dressed. . .

Okay, I admit it.  I knew you thought it anyway.

Carly Simon's song is about me.  You know the one - "You're so vain, I bet you think this song is about you. . .".

When it comes to my children, my grandchildren, my hair and my teeth....Yep -  I'm so vain.

So it should come as no surprise to you that I spend lots of money on my hair (I like it salt and pepper).  AND over the past few months, as I noticed my used to be pretty teeth were beginning to look a bit uneven and had gaps...I started investigating.

I asked my dentist friend, Keith, about them.  I did some research.  I learned that the aging process can result in crowding of lower teeth.  I also learned that my lack of trips to visit a hygienist had resulted in deposits of plaque and made my lower teeth uneven.  That I learned when I bit the bullet and made an appointment with Dr. Larry Burnside, a Mandarin dentist, a few months ago.

He was very kind as he outlined a plan.  I could have some work done.  Oh me, I needed cosmetic dental work.

While I may be vain, I am also quite pragmatic.  Did I want to spend money that way?  I promise you - I thought, I prayed, I agonized.  And it really wasn't that much money.  It's just that I had to decide - my teeth or a new kitchen floor.

That's the back story.

I was in Dr. Burnside's chair recently and kept my eyes closed as he worked on my mouth.

But when I opened my eyes, I could see a smile under the mask of his assistant, Holly, who happens to be one of my dearest friends. She was so excited as she watched the transformation that was happening in my mouth.

Holly's mother, Shiela, is in Heaven now.  I could tell you lots of things about the two of them.  Theirs is a sweet story of love and forgiveness.  I think the story is one of the reasons that today - Holly has a beautiful smile.  And it is fortunate for me, who is old enough to be Holly's mother, that she gives me some of the love she misses being able to give to her mother.

There's just something about forgiveness and love - and allowing Jesus's love to show through us.

Sometimes that's a bit difficult to do.  I've said it many times in recent days - "The trouble with life is that it is so daily" (that's not original, but I don't know where I heard it). The struggles that we all face each day - from traffic to paying bills to caregiving.

My smile is a little better now - I just have to make sure I am also smiling on the inside.  Besides, "you're never fully dressed without a smile."

                                      May your life be filled with enough Sunshine...

                               ...to make you appreciate the Shadows